I’ve spent my entire sexually mature life dealing with this. With a partner, I can’t fuck cum. Well, I can, but when I lastly go through the pain of allowing myself open during that one fucking session, it’s generally just small orgasms. Every time I make the choice to lastly work towards a clit orgasm, I have to go through this lengthy process of reminding myself to let go and just feel what’s going on. That I can’t always have a clitoral orgasm is driving me bonkers. I’m the G spot orgasm Queen. They come easily and I can squirt a three-foot stream, but I don’t seem to let my partner go enough to have a body-shaking clitoral orgasm–one where it feels as intense as when I masturbate with my salsa solo. I can’t bring myself to cum even with co-masturbation or mutual masturbation with my Salsa.
I’m on a search now. In the next few months, it’s my objective to stop forcing the small little clit orgasms with my partner during sex, and simply let me cum, no matter how long it takes or how many times we have to give up. I’ll finally get there. And I intend to document my failures and achievements and share tips on this strange journey (if I even come up with any tips), as I’m sure there are many females who are struggling with this and tired of the same ancient sorry ass advice from the magazine. You know, the usual, “attempt with a vibrator to spice up your love life! Most women’s vaginal stimulation alone won’t orgasm.”* yawn* We understand that. Vibrators have been attempted by most of us. Most of us have tried with our partners many different toys and techniques, but they don’t get off yet. Perhaps if the media focused less on buying, buying, buying, and more on sexual abuse / body picture issues / mental blocks, all of which prevent orgasm, more couples would have better sex lives. I understand for sure that sexual abuse causes my inner blocks, but right now I’m not going to go into that.